Well, its no secret that I am a mother to three little boys so of course I have some war wounds, some battle scars if you like. Some are physical that can be seen and some you can’t see. You see not only have I birthed three beautiful boys all in very different circumstances, but I also went through the ultimate heartbreak that 7 years of unexplained infertility, 7 miscarriages, an ectopic pregnancy and 2 rounds of IVF brings.
Nothing worthwhile in life comes without sacrifice and hard work does it! and isn’t that the truth in my case huh!
Recently, I’ve seen a lot of brave women on Instagram bearing their C-section scars. The idea behind the reveals is to try and show to the world that these Mama’s are strong Mama’s too and just because they had a section, this does not mean that they too did not give a home to and grow their babies for 9 months and then bring them safely into this world. Absolutely true. I know some women have to have a section for medical reasons, some in emergency circumstances and some through pure choice alone, but the important thing here is that they all safely brought a child into the world by whatever means that took.
When you are pregnant and under the care of a midwife in this country, they will ask you to complete a Birth Plan, which is basically details of how you would like and how you envision the birth of your baby to be.
While this is all very well and good, in my experiences, I believe that birth is really something that can never be planned and mapped out in advance. You see babies have a habit of coming when they want to, some early and by surprise and some really late and induction is required.
When I was pregnant with my first child, I was asked to complete such a birth plan and of course like many of you, I said I wanted a calm and relaxed environment with soft lighting and background music, a water birth and as little medical intervention and pain relief as possible. Isn’t this the dream for all of us though! I think very few of us are lucky enough to actually achieve these dreams in reality though are we?
No one can say what is going to happen in that birthing room and I think the most important thing is to try and stay calm and to be flexible in your choices and to be able to go with the flow of whatever you feel you need at the time, or the medical professionals advise, to get your baby safely born and into your arms.
As mentioned above, I’ve birthed three babies now and all in very different circumstances. My first was born via an emergency ventouse delivery following my baby becoming stuck and being in serious distress, my second was an emergency caesarean section due to me suffering from a placental abruption and by third baby was a VBAC, although with another ventouse delivery, but this time due to my inability to be able to push effectively because of a spine condition that I have. (more detailed birth stories can be read on a separate blog page ……cleverly entitled “My Birth Stories”!! ).
Do I have a preferred labour and birth option? No I do not. Do I think that a caesarean section is the “easy option”? absolutely not, especially with regard to my own physical recovery following the birth. I’m not going to lie to you the C-section was tough on me. It was a very frightening experience in emergency circumstances and one which I wouldn’t wish to repeat out of choice alone. I found the section to be a lot harder to recover from. The scars of it are still physical 3 years on.
But I bare my scars with pride all the same, as these are my reminder of what I went through to bring my babies into the world and so therefore to me, every little scar is a mark of bravery a medal of sorts and most definitely a mark of beauty.
I’d go through it all again tomorrow to have my babies……..